The month was April 2009. I had recently separated from IBM after 8 years of service. My executive MBA diploma from the University of Denver was still hot off the printer. My two old cars were sold, my possessions stored neatly in my friends basement. A one-way ticket to Japan was my hands.
It is now April 2019. I am spending my days in a small hermitage in northern Bali. Reflecting on these 10 years and inquiring into the 10 ahead. I recently gave up my home in Thailand, sold my possessions and now have a one-way ticket to Colorado in my hands.
This blog began 10 years ago as I sought means to document my explorations and my travels and to keep in touch with loved ones I was so far away from. Quickly I discovered I was less interested in the outer journey than I was the inner one. I discovered Zen Buddhism, traditional hatha yoga, tantric shaivism, and so, so much more. This impulse and the desire for shared practice and community eventually rooted me on Koh Phangan in Thailand the last 4 years. Everything changes, however.
There are a number of reasons for my departure from Asia, and a number more for my return to Colorado. I wish to unfold a number of these reasons in words in the weeks ahead for you, dear reader, but mostly as an act of solidifying and deepening my own comprehension of events and experiences.
In this moment I am simply filled with gratitude and awe for all that I have seen, experienced, received. The list of individuals and places that I wish to express gratitude towards is overwhelming. That ‘guy’ from 2009 shares my name and appears to be a slightly younger and fitter version of me – however sometimes I wonder if he had any idea what was in store for him over the next decade and of how many guides and inspirations he would meet on his path.
At one point, as I formulated my plan to move back to the US, I had a feeling of being a dog returning home with his tail between his legs, as they often do when they lose a fight. Returning because I didn’t know what else to do, therefore retreating to my place of safety. YET, I see now this returning is actually an active decision, a decision that is less of a going-away from, but more of a going-towards, something. That some-thing, is yet to be determined.
To be continued…